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I’d like an official code of public conduct. You can put that in caps. Of course, when I told him so, he merely smiled.
Why 'of course'? If you want to keep the nature of your relationship private, shouldn't you come to an agreement about what he will and won't do in public? Surely he doesn't wish to embarrass you in the way he did.
He could let you order your own drinks, since "you don't want the outside world to see this exchange of power". And if your order goes against an agreement you've made, or what he knows to be your own long-term wishes, only then should he intervene. You'll be embarrassed then, but you'll know you're to blame.
Theo chas_dar-at-yahoo.co.uk
by Theo on 2005 Apr 27 - 08:04 | reply to this comment Tactful Reminders Yes, one thing I find objectionable about your husband's conduct is that you hadn't even ordered yet. He had no way of knowing whether you were going to make the right or the wrong choice yet he stepped in and completely took it away from you. I would be humiliated and angry.
Being a diabetic, and trying to clean up my act after a long while of being out of control with it, I made an agreement with my husband that we will say something if we see the other making a poor food choice (he has high cholesterol and could use to slim down, so his eating is putting him at risk also).
However I would not blurt out in front of our friends, "Hey, you're not supposed to be eating that." And I would hope he would not do that to me either. A touch and a whispered, "Remember?" would work just as well and not expose anyone to public embarrassment. At the very worst if one of us insisted on ordering a sweet dessert, we could offer to share it so the damage is reduced.
"Pat"
